this and that, sort of......

so the M.S. situation is for now 'just M.E., still'....revisit it in a few months after trying a treatment for the new symptom....so far the side effects are not all that pleasant but I'll persevere......

the situation with the emotional vampire has reached 'critical mass'/'saturation point'.....or some expression like that: I have my final letter drafted out and ready to post.....

and I have realised that having worn my own knitted socks, I couldn't go back to 'ordinary': I had washed all my hand knitted ones, my feet were cold, so I put on a pair of shop socks and couldn't bear the feeling - just horrible; so my feet are sock spoiled ;)

it's quite incredible the difference in feel, touch, fit, just everything; actually, makes me feel quite good about my sock knitting: it might not be perfect, but then neither are my (long thin) feet.......and I seem to get by ok.......

home made socks and Doc Martens(boots or shoes) for comfort I say......

just a thought...

you know in the Peanuts cartoons, where Lucy holds the ball and pulls it away just as Charlie Brown kicks? That's what it's like with the emotional vampire.......I'm Charlie, keeping coming back for more, and she's Lucy..........

she's back.......

....the emotional vampire: after allowing myself to be lulled into a false sense of 'security'(ie wishhful thinking) I got a letter today which is back to the same old, same old.......the boy crying worf scenario.

how much sense that makes to anyone I'm not sure but it's such a complex background that I can't begin to put it clearly in my head, let alone words or here. Suffice to say that after a long talk with my shrink several years ago, and describing the situation, he not only agreed with me but also understood my feeling this way and helped me feel ok about it.

for the moment I am doing nothing.......but I need to do SOMETHING and the time is approaching where I may have to cut off completely. Not easy when it is your mother.........